Variegation
by TheDemonsAreInside
Summary: A Lorikki FanFiction written from Lorraine's POV which may include a few plant pot references (because I thought there were some deep-rooted emotions attached to that plant pot) and centres around her (imaginary) return to Waterloo Road following her departure in the previous series. It is currently a one-shot but could potentially become something more. Tell me what you think!
1. Chapter 1

I'm strolling into the head's office; determined to see what havoc Christine's wrecked since my tragic departure just a couple of weeks ago when something catches my eye; a plant pot... one that certainly wasn't there when Michael was head. It's quite attractive for a plant; with glossy variegated green leaves... sleek and shiny like the hair of the woman I used to think I loved... and maybe still do. The plant sits in a pristine white pot; demure amongst the flashy photo frames Christine's installed of late.

"That's a nice plant," I glance at it casually; trying to set a relaxed tone for our informal meeting but instead allowing chaos to break out; my heart smashing into thousands of tiny pieces when I hear her cruel Scottish sneer of a reply.

"Nikki gave it to me," she grins; wetting her lower lip with her tongue and narrowing her eyes. I dismiss this at once; sure that my beautiful ex-girlfriend would never have cavorted with this snake given all that she did to me... to us... Her frolicking with the headmaster was surely the only reason for the demise of my relationship... Nikki would NEVER have done ANYTHING to satisfy this bitch.

"Something the matter?" Christine feigns confusion as my blood starts to slowly boil with jealousy as I turn and head towards the door with only one thing on my mind; to find Nikki and to make absolutely sure that Christine's story is a big fucking _lie_. Because Nikki would never have done this to me; she knew full well how much plant pots meant to me; having seen the room in which the collection I've amassed over all these years... having seen me weep at the death of Arnold the cactus who used to sit in the corner of the room. It crushed me when he died... broke my heart to the point that I couldn't think of anything else except the times we spent together... our past may have been prickly but he meant the world to me. And I loved him like I loved nobody else... Nobody else except her; the love of my life... the tough-yet-gentle Nikki Boston.

I find Nikki sitting at the desk in the corner of the PRU and rush up to her; my words tumbling out of my mouth in my desperation to get them out of my mouth.

"Please... Nikki... tell me it isn't true..." I don't even attempt to wipe the tears now racing down my cheeks as I pray to God that Nikki will confirm my hopes and quash my fears. But maybe God doesn't hear me... or maybe he hears me and wants to make me suffer... Either way Nikki's answer crushes my heart and renders me mute; utterly unable to say anything or do anything other than cry.

After a few moments I allow an anguished wail to escape from my lips. "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?" I yell before breaking down completely and collapsing at the side of her desk; opening and closing my mouth... trying to get the air back into my lungs. But it doesn't want to come. And maybe I don't want it to come either. Because no matter what I said to her I STILL LOVED HER when I broke up with her... and maybe I still do.

Nikki's kneeling down beside me now; brushing my curly blonde hair out of my tear-filled eyes and gazing straight into them; her lips slightly parted as she moves closer and closer to me until the tips of our noses are almost touching.

"I never stopped loving you," she whispers before tilting her head to the side slightly and closing her eyes as she presses her soft lips against my tear-stained ones; her arms wrapping around me; holding me close. And I'm not thinking about the plant pots anymore... I'm just thinking about her and me and all of the things we went through and all of the things we never did and I want her back... I really do. But I'm too scared to say anything... too scared to break away from the kiss; terrified that it could be our last... So I try to tell her everything I want to through the kiss; my tongue circling around her own as I pull her closer to me. And I want to stay like this forever.

Nikki breaks away from the kiss to get air and as she moves in to kiss me again I hold her back. "I'm so sorry, Nikki... I never wanted to hurt you..." I sob as she watches on; her own eyes filling with tears now.

"I know you didn't..." she kisses me gently on my lips. "Lorraine... I'm so... so... sorry about giving Christine that pot plant... I wasn't thinking... I just..." I kiss her hard; not wanting to hear anymore... I don't want this to be about my obsessive hoarding of pot plants; I want this to be about me and Nikki... about us.

"Take me back," I murmur against her frantic lips; my heart freezing in suspense as I wait with bated breath for her imminent reply.


	2. Chapter 2

**I had a plant pot once and it died and broke my heart so the emotions in this FanFiction are very real indeed.**

**Thanks for all of your lovely reviews though and sorry that this chapter is so short - there's only so much you can say about vegetation...**

"We can make it work this time... I promise you!" I pull away from her lips to stare into her eyes; trying to read her like a book... desperate to see whether we're on the same page. Sometimes I wish I could just flip to the ending and see whether we have a happily ever after... but that's not possible so I've just got to live like everyone else does; one boring day at a time.

"Can we though?" Nikki asks me as she stands up; her cobalt eyes cautious... too scared to commit to anything because she's terrified that it'll end like it did last time; with her breaking my heart (and my leg) when she quite literally kicked me out of her house after I murmured Arnold's name whilst making love to her. Arnold. Just thinking about him makes me want to collapse in a heap of tears. But I can't do that... can I? I've got to stay strong... for Nikki... for me; I've got to move on from the cactus I used to call the plant of my life. It's much easier to love a plant than a woman; especially a cactus which asks for nothing except a bit of water once every few weeks. Because cactuses are used to the dry conditions of the desert. But I don't like it dry; I like it wet.

"We can... please believe me!" I beg; kneeling down before her and finding myself in an all too familiar position.

"What about those... plants?" she swallows heavily at the word; watching my face as she says it; looking for any sign of weakness. But I'm not going to mess up again like I did last time with my constant obsessing over plants; I want our relationship to bloom and grow, I want to deflower her once and for all... I want to bang her on the greenhouse floor. Because it's not about the plant anymore... it's about her; the woman I love... it's about showing her what she means to me – everything and a whole lot more.

"What about them?" I ask her; my voice shaking as my eyes plead with her not to make me do anything to them because I don't think my heart could handle it; those plants were my only friends... and they still are if I'm honest with myself. Nothing could replace the affectionate nibble of Vena (my Venus Flytrap) or the protective nature of my cacti; drawing blood of anyone who dares to touch them... anyone but me. Because they love me... a whole lot more than I love myself.

"They need to go, Lorraine... You can't keep relying on them for comfort in the dead of the night..."

"Why not?"

"Because they're not people, Lorraine. They're fucking plants. Can they wrap their branches around you and pull you closer and keep you safe? Can they talk to you and make you feel human again? Can they fuck you like I can? Wait no... don't answer that..."

Nikki's words are breaking me apart; tearing me to pieces on the PRU floor and I can't listen to anymore; I can't stand it, so I bury my face in my hands and leap to my feet; running out of the school; trying to get as far away from the hateful woman telling me cruel lies about my plants as I can. Lies which I know to be true. Because somewhere... deep deep down (though not as deep down as the roots of the great oak sitting in the centre of my garden) I KNOW that my plants don't love me the same way I love them; unconditionally and unintentionally. But I still tell myself that they love me all the same. Because it's easier like that; to pretend that my love for my vegetation is requited than to think about the truth – that NOBODY LOVES ME.

I burst into hot tears as I put my foot down on the accelerator and drive away.


	3. Chapter 3

**I was exceptionally disappointed that the legendary lant pot failed to make an appearance in last week's Waterloo Road.**

**Thanks for your reviews - they actually make me laugh so much!**

The tears are still spilling down my face as I pull into my house and practically fall out of my car in my distraught state; crawling through my garden on my hands and knees; cursing when my knee drags through some dog shit. I don't even have a dog – I don't really like them; it's all about the cats for me... and by cats I mean pussy.

I wipe my knee on the grass; determined to remove all traces of the foul mess covering it; feeling the blades of grass prickle over my leg; feeling them and liking them. Grass is good. GRASS is better; rolled up in a joint; the fumes filling me up and letting me go. Marijuana is a magical plant; the very best. It sells well too; £300 pounds on the street... letting me rake it in... I fucking love that plant; attribute it to everything I am today; mad, crazy and probably richer than you'll ever be.

I've spent thousands on my gardens over the years; hiring gardener after gardener to tidy it up and make it orgasmic. I had to sack my regular gardener after he decided to plant some bushes in my garden; I hate the things... clean shaven is the way to go thank you very much. None of the other gardeners have been quite the same though; indeed many of them have actually _run away_ after being instructed to make my garden make me feel good. They've done a good job though; making my backyard a plant-lover's paradise; with a majestic palace sitting in the very centre; a greenhouse; its clear walls giving the outside world a peek of what's growing inside; heaven.

I catch a great waft of blooming vegetation as I stumble into the greenhouse; my eyes brimming with tears of joy as I notice that my marijuana plants have started flowering; beautiful white balls of magic growing all over them. I want to take a photo and savour the moment, but it's too risky and, as I whisper lovingly to my plants all too often, this must stay as _our dirty little secret_. It's my favourite secret of them all; the special relationship I have with my babies. It kills me when I sell them on though; like I've lost the only things in my life that actually understand me... I pour my heart out to these plants; praying that no police surveillance is in operation.

It's not just illegal plants that I grow though; I've tenderly cultivated hundreds of carrots over the years, but they're not the same; they do nothing for me... Neither do courgettes... I have a love-hate relationship with cabbages... But nothing compares to the relationship I have with the prized plants growing in my greenhouse. On occasion I've dreamt about banging Nikki on the greenhouse floor; the only things that make life worth living all in one place. It'd be hot, steamy and sensuous... And I think I'd like it. Stripped bare; back to nature's deepest roots.

I peek out of the back of my greenhouse; groaning when I notice the muddy patch the gardener left. I guess it'd be good for moisture-loving plants... I've got a lot in common with moisture-loving plants, but I'm not quite sure how they'd fit in amongst my beds of thorny roses; the roses which tore me to shreds and broke my heart... I told the doctor it was a domestic issue... he referred me to a psychiatrist.

I spot a cucumber lying on the side in the greenhouse and pick it up tentatively; unsure of how it got there. I'm not really into cucumbers, if I'm honest with myself... they taste okay but as plants there's nothing special about them. When buying from shops I always buy organic cucumbers being unable to imagine any worse horror than my poor beloved babies being sprayed with poisonous chemicals day and night. I treat my plants like I treat my ladies; keeping them moist; making sure that they're drenched by the end of our time together.

The greenhouse door bangs open and I turn in horror; cucumber in hand to see Nikki staring at me; her eyes full of confusion. And then she starts yelling; shouting that I'll never get over my obsession with vegetation. Secretly I agree, but I'm not going to tell her that, so instead I rack my brains for a witty comeback.

"Where's all of this stemming from, petal?" I smirk.


End file.
